The Blog = Library Card

Today our continuing series of literary classics which may or may not have been improved if conveyed through the medium of texting turns its focus to the great tradition of Victorian ghost stories. The selection we’ve chosen is The Horror at Braughmsby Gate: A Tale of Unsettling Transpirance by C. H. Metherwill, a popular author around the time when wainscoting was much discussed.

The Horror at Braughmsby Gate: A Tale of Unsettling Transpirance by C. H. Metherwill

It was on or about the 23rd of October, 18__ that the following exchange occurred, which with pen and patience I hereby relate 4 posterity.

I had chosen 2 take lodgings @ the parish of the local vicar for the summer solstice, being of temperant custom @ the time, and none 2 infractious. During dinner, he was seen 2 recline at leisure w/ pipe & tobacco & heard 2 recount this chilling factual narrative:

“It was on the eve of frostmas, 18__ that a most troubling apparition materialised @ Underswich Moor past sundown, causing the charwoman 2 wring her hands most fitfully and exclaim, in a tone that it pains me 2 say in such pleasant company can only be described as tremulous, ‘My word! ‘Tis an apparition that bears the most striking resemblance 2 the late Mme. Foursault!’ At which point she made haste 2 call on Father Wickerby, who was undoubtedly put out by the lateness of the hr., having been inclined 2 put himself abed early w/ pipe & tobacco & his notes 4 a defence of the Episcopacy @ the Archdeaconry of Chulbridge Friar.’ “

I leave it upon U, dear reader, 2 judge whether this extraordinary tale seems 2 ring of truth or cruel fiction, but whithever, it has now certainly been set down, & thus no further comment can be made which may affect the behaviors or attitudes of those named within it. May God look kindly upon their labors!

END OF THE HORROR AT BRAUGHMSBY GATE: A TALE OF UNSETTLING TRANSPIRANCE, BY C.H. METHERWILL

Questions for review:

1) How do you think this story would have differed if it were actually, you know, good?
2) Imagine the names in this story were names like Flannery, O’Shaughnessy, and Doyle. Would that make you even angrier? Are there any nationalities you can think of besides the Irish that you don’t particularly care for?
3) How much would you pay to get the last two minutes of your life back, and why?