Abbey Road. (What Do You Mean, "Someone Already Used That Title?")

Hey kids! Before thoughts of summer vacation start to roll around, make sure you’ve asked Mom and Dad to reserve your spot at the coolest sports camp ever!

Yes, Soren Narnia’s Soccer Violence Camp for Boys 9-14 is a three-week trip to scenic Syracuse, New York, where real life pros will teach you the skills necessary to become an unpredictable, remorseless, and racist soccer hooligan! Let superstar rioters Davy Bland, Nigel Lurthington, Cesar Casparosa, and Lupe Haldeza teach you all the basics of soccer violence, from the finer points of throwing stones to the subtle techniques of psychological intimidation to the dos and don’ts of fashioning your own smoke bombs. There’s archery, crafts, and swimming too! Don’t just sit around and watch soccer violence videos from CNN or Setanta Sports all summer---get in the game! Why, you might even get to meet twice-convicted hooligan THIS BLOG ENTRY HAS BEEN CANCELLED BY A MYSTERIOUS STAR CHAMBER OF SHADOWY AUTHORITIES WHO ARE PRETTY SURE THAT SOMEWHERE, SOMEONE MUST HAVE ALREADY WRITTEN THIS GAG PRETTY MUCH VERBATIM. AS PART OF HIS AGREEMENT WITH THIS SECRETIVE CABAL OF RETIRED JUDGES, HANGMEN, AND PHARMACEUTICAL EXECUTIVES, MR. NARNIA HAS PLACED FIFTY CENTS INTO THE PLAGIARISM JAR AND WILL NOW BE ALLOWED TO GO ABOUT HIS BUSINESS, WHATEVER THAT ACTUALLY IS. THE REST OF TODAY'S SPACE WILL BE DEVOTED TO A REVIEW OF "GHOST RIDER."

Ghost Rider
* 1/2

Ghost Rider's no good, man.